its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
Fat lady wearing Shape Up's. I would feel bad making crude comments, but she has to know it's coming.
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
She opened a beer bottle with her armpit and then gave me a cigarette from the waistband of her underwear. I dont know if I want to be her or marry her.
Jesus christ how hard is BRING SNACKS AND DRUGS to interpret? I trust your judgement on this one.
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
We were just sitting together and this guy walks up to us and says, "you ladies are drinking too slow", puts a 5 dollar bill on the table and just leaves the bar. Helloooo Taco Bell
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
Just walked past the field playing Jesus music with a fanny pack full of condoms and beer. Happy Sunday.
Matt is trying to convince me that we have a deal where if I show him my tits he won't do cocaine. Apparently we shook hands on it?
Randomize
