one two three fourrrrnication!
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
recess is on disney at 4 in the morning, insomnia has never been so rewarding
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
I just wished the taco bell drive thru guy a happy cinco de mayo. Who says arizonians hate mexicans?
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
I'm sitting here in nothing but my panties, eating beef jerky and reese's for breakfast.Today is not the day to expect me to make sound life decisions.
Sometimes you just need a break, and sometimes you also need to get stoned on these breaks. I sound like some kind of fucked up mr rogers when I say shit like that.
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.
TURNS OUT they were both cheating. Like the Gift of the Magi except for shitty people
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
Randomize
