I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
I literally have a bandage on my dick that's how bad she is at handjobs
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
Hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking you had a pulse
Randomize
