Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
It's like Facebook knows when I'm about to masturbate and tells me to reconnect with exes.
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
There's a stripper banging on the door demanding to see you.
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
That bitch makes my crazy look like a walk in the park with cotton candy
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
I don't care if my next phone has to run on the blood of virgin koala bears, I don't want to be scrambling for a charger.
I just want nice things and good sex
I just had a random tinder dude give me a ride home from school because my car is dead. Tinder rules! It's like Uber, but with boys who want to impress you.
Randomize
