so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
At the pride parade. It's not even noon and I'm drunk as shit... for equality of course
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
THAT WAS PROBABLY MY ONE CHANCE TO SLEEP WITH A MAN NAMED BORIS AND YOU RUINED IT.
I think I pulled my groin stumbling back from the bar. That or the hippo I woke up next to.
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy
You get drunk and try to bury your girlfriend in the sand JUST ONCE and all hell breaks loose
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
She just took a mirror selfie at the hospital while in labor.
I just love that it's Veterans Day because I know in my heart that I have serviced some of their brethren in the dirtiest, hottest, most shameful ways possible.
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
Randomize
