I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
Is singing the Indiana Jones theme while I put on the condom off limits?
I'm not the one who can lose their erection, so it's fair game
You sent me snap chats of you guys having sex. Like plural. It was like flip book porn, I'm traumatized.
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
So my parents just watched me pour their rum into a bottle and only add crystal light powder, no water... Talk about being judged. All I could say was "Cortland tricks?"
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
He left cushions on my floor, chocolate on my bra and unexplained scratches on my thighs. I think this one might get a second date.
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
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