super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
There's limited edition cherry vanilla nyquil. It's like they know how much I hate myself and they're giving me a consolation prize.
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
REAL PEOPLE DRINK 3 BEERS ALONE WILL WATCHING THE LIFETIME MOVIE ABOUT PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
This is a great bar, except you can't even randomly burst into song without them assuming you're drunk and cutting you off.
You know it's been a good thanksgiving when you pee all over your own hands.
He said bring my breathalyzer and Anna's pepper spray, I didn't ask questions
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
Dick very happy bro
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
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