The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
I think a kid would responsible me up
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
I need you to know that everytime my toddler does the downward facing dog in the nude I think about the night you and your dude fell in love.
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
He tried to buy me a drink at dollar beer night. All 3 of his credit cards were declined, so he asked me if I could cover it. Needless to say, I'm not calling him back.
But what I'm actually thinking about is how everyone except me had sex on my bed this weekend and now I'm just sleeping in it with a 7 foot tall blue panda
You will be reminded everyday when you witness my majestic mustache.
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