The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
He left his umbrella behind in my bed to 'keep me company', then stole my front door key before he went to work
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
I wiped my blood on their walls screaming "IT'S NOT MY SECURITY DEPOSIT!"
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
Im dating a 38 year old who's lap I can fit in. Tell me I don't have daddy issues.
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
The Uber driver took us to a Waffle House. We didn't even say anything when we got in. MAGIC.
I just smoked weed out of a tomahawk, then chased an armadillo with said tomahawk, I love my life.
dude. I can hear the air.
I just gave a fucking twenty minute blowiob.. I'm a GOOD girlfriend.
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