i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
I would drag my balls through a mile of broken glass to eat pudding out of her anus
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
My goal tonight is to get arrested because what cop can say they have ever arrested a giant sperm before. God I love halloween
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
reason #326 why I'm still single.... my date just told me there's a little boy ghost that lives in his closet because he likes his music.
After fooling around at the hotel til dawn, I managed to feed her with my free buffet passes. Tastes like sweet victory.
We're the worst. Two people without their shit together do not make a functional adult.
Doing the walk of shame from the back of a Jeep to the porta potty it's parked next to while your dad watches is not what you want.
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
Randomize
