Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
don't worry, i already broke the ice when i told the story about how i super glued a picture of big bird to my vag.
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
I just woke up to people screaming "funnel" in my kitchen....
Happy St. Patrick's Day.
I'm at the cafe. It's 7am. There is a girl I don't know on my futon who tried to tickle me this morning when I got down from my loft. I also not wearing any underwear.
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
While I was sneeking out of her apartment, there was a giant cage with a parrot in it. I half expected it to squak "hit and run...hit and run."
We're not piercing ourselves today.
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
When you get this divorce finalized we're going to mid evil times AND pirate dining adventure. We're gonna find you a couple of real men and make them joust/swashbuckle for your affection. My treat.
He’s going to a lawnmower race. I got a Brazilian and he’s racing a lawnmower race. Pick me up. I’m not wasting this waxing on John Deer
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