I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
I've been drunk so often this summer being sober is exciting
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
I must have drunkenly masturbated really loud last night, cause my roommate and his wife wont look at me
Fate is real! that hot chick, Megan just showed up dressed as jasmine and I'm dressed as Aladdin this is going to be cake
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
BURNT NIPPLES ARE UNHAPPY NIPPLES.
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
Hey, dude, is Kevin still passed out on your porch?
Yeah. I'm gonna go leave a pitcher of bloody mary next to him in case he's still alive.
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
Randomize
