Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
you were watching the nanny crying, saying I wish I was that thin eating twinkies. THAT DRUNK.
Shaun got a portable breathalyzer for christmas so now we can tell who the biggest pussy is at the end of the night.
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
there was a kid getting taken out of the waterpark handcuffed to a wheelchair singing "tryna catch me ridin dirty"
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
Just realized my relationship wasn't even Facebook official and I'd already cheated on him. 'Shitty girlfriend' is an understatement.
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
Randomize
