thus making me awesome and them whores
I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter.
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
Who knew there were so many rules and judgements about laying on a kitchen floor. I'm all like I'm resting. It just happens to be on a kitchen floor.
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
I've been trying to masturbate for the longest time now and so far I've accomplished getting tangled in my computer battery cord and phone charger and hitting my knee on my laptop.
I woke up and saw that my last google search was "Bacon neck".
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
Randomize