I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
Just threw up in the garbage can outside the liquor store... I'm pretty sure that's some sort of distress signal.
I don't have any swimsuits that don't show off the weird handprint bruises on my hips. Do you have a onepiece I can borrow?
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
I'm like a walking PSA for tequila shots
He refused to pierce my nipples, saying they are the best he's ever seen and that blemishing them would be a crime
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
I have a knack for carnage and poetic language.
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
Listen, i know this is weird for you, but as your fuck buddy, id prefer if you didnt fuck her.
Youre asking too much from me
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
Randomize
