i hope you realize that ur overconfidence only gave me one orgasm out of all the times we had sex. that's like a 1% success rate. u might wanna rethink how amazing you are.
You totally narrated your dogs thoughts for 2 and a half hours last night, and I was enthralled. I didn't say one word, I just listened.
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
At what point lastnight did a lens fall out of my glasses and nobody tell me?
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
My grandma just invited me to gate crash a funeral for the free food. Priorities.
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
Randomize
