how can u be prego again
Listen: if you or anyone else at work finds a starfish in a bowl, just leave it. It'll be gone by next week.
Better yet, if you find it can you put it in the mini-fridge in your office for safe keeping? Spanks.
And if it's going to get me in trouble, maybe just don't mention that I know anything about it.
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
Hey, my drug test is at 4:15 tomorrow. I'll meet you 5 minutes later.
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
Do you always skip to "Baby Got Back" when fat girls show up at the bar?
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
I tried to find an emoji but none convey my excitement for receiving good sex soon
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
Only in the emergency room do they shut the door when youre laughing too hard
He stopped in the middle of us fucking so he could turn on lithuanian techno music. And the sad thing is that it was the best sex of my life.
my night went from a boring school play to hotboxing a car with 3 criminals
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