i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
just took my abortion antibiotic with my martini. i no longer wonder how i got into this situation.
He said he had to make up a lie of why he couldnt sleep with her. It must really suck to have a sunburned dick.
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
What's the proper amount of time to avoid my 76 year old neighbor that caught me with my pants down, peeing in my driveway at 5am?
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
Do you know how hard it is to maintain a conversation with someone who just told you they put their cat in the fridge on purpose?
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
I drink to make the karaoke go away.
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
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