pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
So i guess my mom went into the kitchen and asked me why i was making mac and cheese at 4 in the morning and apparently i yelled at her to "get the fuck back bitch you don't know my life"
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
Just got my first unemployment direct deposit!!!' celebrating at the beach
Me toooooo!! Margaritas
I never knew being a drain on a functioning society would feel so good
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
Banging to Billy Joel pandora is like russian roulette. But I made him cum to Let It Be so I we both walked away victors
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
Am I under any obligation to let my new fuck buddy know I slept with his little sister?
Soo I'm in the trunk of a car drunk about to jump on trampolines. My life rocks!
So naked ping pong was a mistake... Looks like we were attacked by an octopus.
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