Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
Hey, I didn't ask that stripper to put her unds in my mouth, it was just covered by the plus package fee I ordered.
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
He screamed AMERICA, took a shot of vodka out of a Tupperware container, and then asked if he could see my tits
My night started to turn around the time I started calling her a "raggedy cunt".
Somehow she got that I meant it as a term of endearment.
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
Randomize
