Im listening to a jazz version of dick in a box.
i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
she always made me post sex PB&Js it was like fucking a trashier Martha Stewart
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
She's going to hate me
Yeah well one of her many personalities always hates you.
The rest will just start to agree
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
Randomize
