sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
From one hot mess to another... Get it together.
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
I moved out... There's nothing left but his childhood trophies...
You should make him a new one, you know like "you suck at relationships but thanks for trying participation award"
Why do you have an empty bottle of port in your bathroom bin?
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
You fell out of his top bunk onto his set of golf clubs. After seeing blood on your leg, you proceeded to sing "the first cut is the deepest" while sprawled on the golf clubs
Parade of Dicks...that's what I'm calling 2017
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
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