like if someone fucked a dictionary but instead of having a penis, it was just one of those leap frog educational toys
I hope to god you are high
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
Remind me again why a vodka watermelon can't be a thanksgiving dish
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
Let's try finding a bar where there aren't people who want to hang me from a tree by my nutsack
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
She just kept feeding people pretzels and sayying "You're such a good goldfish."
Randomize
