Well douche your snatch and let's go!
Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
I'm pretty sure that when my parents bought me those savings bonds they thought it would go towards something useful like tuition. Not your bail.
I told you I'd buy you lunch.
Charles Darwin would shit his pants if he saw that we managed to survive that weekend.
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
Apparently throwing balloons filled with vodka off the roof is considered terrorism.
So far today I've found 3.5 million dollars in savings. Pretty sure management is gonna start buying me hookers if getting laid has this much payoff
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
The Olympian is in my bed
You did what with his pubic hair?
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
Randomize
