That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
I was talking to this girl who was in love with the air force. I was doing decently until I mentioned that the navy actually has more planes. Cockblocked by my knowledge of random trivia again.
Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
I tried really hard to get you laid last night. And by that I mean I asked a bunch of dudes if they were top or bottom.
Just had to return the shit I stole from the dining hall, with everyone watching...apparently there ARE consequences for being drunk, coked up and belligerent.
Oh please tell me that I'm sleeping in your shower and not the neighbor's again
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
THERE IS A VERY SMALL CHILD YELLING OUTSIDE OF MY DOOR. THE NEXT TIME YOU TELL ME YOUR TOO BIG FOR A CONDOM I'M GOING TO PUNCH YOU IN THE DICK.
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
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