try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
If a weird guy texts you in the near future asking if you are satan just go with it
I would but he’s not speaking to me because I put ketchup in his socks.
Randomize
