i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
Omg. Just talked to a semi driver from nebraska. Got her truck stuck. Gave her and her riding buddy a glass of vodka and a cig. YES.
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
The alcohol tastes like we did a beer run at the nail salon
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
Eh. Fuck him. He's missing out. I'm legit naked and drinking straight from the bottle of wine.
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
You got up in the middle of a sentence, puked, came out and poured another glass of wine and continued your story.
Randomize