I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
you ate skittles off the table like a hungry hungry hippo. it was awesome.
can u get pink eye on your cock?
We have a drunk bartender with her nips a quarter inch from bein out buying us shots. GET HERE.
You just said the magic words
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
Just retrieve me from the bathroom floor when you're done
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
I just found two ugly toothless rednecks fucking in the woods in my backyard. The man shouted at me close the door your letting the stank out which made no sense to me cuz we where outside. Whatever. just another Monday in the Northwoods.
Randomize
