You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
there's a wrestler here in a Ferrari//puma hoodie who is telling girls his win//loss record as a pickup line.
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
I really need to find a new way to reward you other than head scratches, nutella and blowjobs.
Frats are adorable. They make mediocre guys think they're worth a shit.
...the American dream.
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
If I come back tomorrow to find a certain football player tied up and locked in your closet, shit's gonna get real.
I'll set him free tomorrow morning ;)
When i'm home next we need to get baked and go to waffle house. I want to see if the waitress can still guess my intoxication level and what i'm about to order before i even make it to the table.
I was just doing the math on how much beer we need for the houseboat. in doing so, I came to the conclusion that we need to open a beer distributor business.
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
Randomize
