i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
He was eating me out on the dryer...and his mom walked in with her laundry basket...
He wasn't the only one with a full load.
They should make Jack Daniels chap stick
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
I can count the number of hours she's been sober this weekend on one hand.
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
maybe her throwing up on me was a foreshadowing of how she would later metaphorically throw up on my life
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
So I had sex with a hook nosed, lisping masadonian last night.
Glad that degree in literature is paying off. Nice adjectives. Maybe set the bar a little higher though?
conclusion from last night: i should wear boob glitter more often
Is it okay to mention my ambition to become a supervillian and kill all humans on a first date, or is that a second date discussion?
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
Randomize
