the cashier wished me a happy fathers day while i bought condoms
normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
Just saw some lesbians get in a fistfight in an Arby's parking lot. It's good to be home.
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
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