Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
I just woke up covered In blood, I have cuts all over my body, I can't find my clothes from last night, I'm still wasted, i'm pretty sure I have a sprained ankle, and the best part is, I have absolutely no recollection of what led to this. THAT'S why vodka is the greatest drink in the world.
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
Don't tits with veins remind you of road maps?
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
I'm soaked in beer, and I think blood. Why did we think we could tap a keg with a hammer?
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
I’m so poor I’m filling a flask with vodka and bringing it to the bar.
Randomize
