Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
I'm drinking till I'm someone else's problem
you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
Have I told you recently that I love you, if for no other reason than you make my irresponsible substance abuse look tame by comparison?
Call me old-fashioned, but I don't think the words, "Finger my ass" should find their way into casual conversation.
Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will.
I don't know when it is this year, but if I ever text you an illegible text that also happens to contain sharks, Shark Week started.
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
They're fucking on the bed next to me. I took adderall and smoked so there's no fucking help for me.
Apparently chalking everything I've done these past 48 hours to the fact that it was homecoming, is like a "get out of jail free" card.
Randomize