i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
throwing up in the shower isnt as glamorous as i expected
since when the fuck is that glamorous?
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
You fell while talking to a cop, then proceeded to acuse him of tripping you... he was arresting you for public intox.
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
Is it acceptable to respond to a declaration of love with 'and I love your dick'? Asking for a friend who shares a name and possibly a phone number with me. Entirely coincidental.
Randomize
