Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
Chances are I'll be there for your wedding. Camelbaks filled with jack and coke are appropriate attire, right?
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
I'm drinking screwdrivers in the pool naked. Call 911 if I don't check in regularly
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
all my money is vodka money
I have never read a truer sentence.
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
The smoothie place is closed, but the liquor store is open and wine is kinda like a smoothie.
Some guy at the bar last night bought us Arrowhead water and I was so drunk, it tasted good
Randomize
