All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
let's get her a shirt that says "i went to key west for spring break and all i got was this illegitimate child."
Don't be a smartass. I'm trying to fuck a guy who's sober. It's more difficult than you think.
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
Discovered that a nalgene holds an entire bottle of wine. Going mobile. Come find me.
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
I currently don't understand fingers.
Randomize
