Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
My brain says no but my pants say off.
So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
She just ended a sentence with "and he doesn't even mind my herpes..."
Sometimes I wonder why I hang out with you. And then you show up half naked at my door with a half gal of vodka, and I remember why.
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
I'm like the kid who wants his birthday and christmas equally. Every time I get one I want the other. Only I don't want holidays I want brothers
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
I want my birthday to be like the hunger games where all the contenders for my vaj have to fight each other off to win the prize
Can I have the second place winner?
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
Randomize
