Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
I just had a dude tell me how he got fired from friendly's for tripping a kid and followed the story with "If i'm gonna do it, I do it big."
Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
When he came he sounded like a flock of birds hitting puberty
if that dog is afraid of alcohol then he's no dog of mine
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
Getting a lap dance from a girl you went to high school with really isn't as awkward as you'd think
And she called me out by name, nothing could have made it more awkward but it ended up not being that bad
I left my Bacardi and dignity in your freezer. Will come get it later.
Actually, my eyes didn't start bleeding until the next day. So it was a pretty awesome night overall.
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