I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
That's so unfortunate for him bc you can always find another penis, but he's stuck with it
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
This is the difference between me and him; he buys you flowers, I buy you a dildo
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
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