The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
Just heard the garage door open and I immediately sprinted to the laptop to erase history, even though I haven't watched porn today...I believe Pavlov now.
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
I just walked in on my roommates playing baseball with old vegetables and a bigass knife.
I'm very fluent in vodka, but that seems to be a whiskey dialect.
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
Grandma is high again and locked herself in the house
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
Randomize
