that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
so i stopped by cvs on the way home this morning, turns out hallmark doesnt make an im sorry my friend puked on your friend card, call me if were still speaking
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
You knocked on your freshman year room door, told the kids who opened it "I own you", and attempted to force-feed them everclear.
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
So I just went to clothing optional bar
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
Randomize
