His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
I thought it was my alarm clock, turns out it was her vibrator still going off on the side of my face.
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
And to celebrate the raising of our lord I just purchased a bunny buttplug. Am I doing this Easter thing right?
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
Why were you doing tequila shots out of Boston Pizza dip containers?
Fun fact: My predictive text now prompts "walrus" as the most likely word to follow "intoxicated"...
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
Randomize