ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
On second thought, trying to signify she was a butter face by wiping my bagel on her cheek may not have been in my best of interests
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
Taking a shit on the side of the road is not how I imagined this morning would start.
I'm laying in bed listening to Purple Rain on repeat. If you wanna bone, come up, but if not, at least Prince understands me.
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
She said she didn't feel right fucking on her parents dining room table I grabbed the only thing around bubblewrap she blew me for creativity
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
I know right, I would blow him just for the satisfaction he would taste like vodka
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