I woke up in a stranger's bathtub with a broken shower curtain as my blanket.
no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
He told me his condom was going to expire tomorrow and he needed to use it. I can't believe I fell for it.
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
The mass text at 3:12AM offering "free scrotum tastings" will have repercussions
For every drunk face picture you send me, I'm gonna send a wholesome family photo.
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
Randomize
