Rock
Scissors
Fuck
dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
Being this Hungover on Easter has brought my closer to Jesus... I swear he had to feel shitty like this after coming back from the dead
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
we got plastered, then made lists of anything thats ever been in our vaginas
I know. Brad is upset because he was lower on the list than "that carrot stick"
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
But really, someone with a penis give me attention before I start posting nudes on Instagram.
Im covered in coffee vomit and urine and none of which are mine
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
I'm sittin in my Hawaiian shorts watching the office eating cold asparagus. wow do I suck when you're not here.
Randomize
