Pete just told the whole party I'm a squirter
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
Dude you were so high some kid was kicking the wall and you were convinced it was your heartbeat
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
You thought there were zombies attacking us so you tried to tuck and roll out of a moving vehicle. Also you should consider wearing underwear
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
I added our drug dealer to the quickbooks software babe, he is listed under vendor's as an expense category... money management is such a bitch...
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
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