I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
You were face down, at your computer, surrounded by beer bottles listening a bagpipes version of amazing grace.
i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
My brother brings gifts into my room to wrap them. It's a pizza cutter and a box of condoms..
I hope as the only other living being in this apartment you can explain to me why the toilet was full of cheerios this morning.
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
I just woke up in the closet wearing nothing but a Santa hat.
I don't know who's idea it was to get wine for a frat party but my poor pitiful hung over self really fucking hates them.
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
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