Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
Day two of vacation and my first drink of the day is a plan b colada
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
I broke a rule
Which One?!
The one where I shouldn't sleep with your friends. I broke this particular rule 4 times.
You're officially the worst brother ever.
Randomize
