i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
There is a mermaid on oprah and she looks nothin like ariel
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
I was really excited when he said that condoms didn't fit him, then he added "they fall right off"...
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
I AM OFFERING YOU ALCOHOL AND THE CHANCE TO LET ME SAY FUCK IT TO MY RESPONSIBILITIES. HOW MANY TIMES DOES THIS HAPPEN?!
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
I wanna die. I can't recall the last time I was happy that doesn't involve your hand touching my butt.
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
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