can you please tell me why I'm bleeding so heavily from my ass and all my makeup is gone?
Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
he just sent me a picture of his penis sticking through a piece of paper that he had drawn a stick figure with tits on it that said "you"
You gave me your shirt to use as a napkin every time I spilled beer on myself. Before we went to the bar.
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
I think your high point was when the quesadilla was in your mouth and you were screaming "I can't chew!" and the Taco Bell guy just kinda stared at you like he wanted to strangle.
Last night you made me help you pick the raisins out of a kashi bar and acted like it was the most important thing to ever happen to you or our friendship
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
Randomize