You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
I skipped work to stalk him.
JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
just left the emergency room. condom extraction.
I just found puke in my bra..
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
If it's not soft enough to fuck on, then we're not getting the new rug.
Hi I am too sober and out of rum. Translation: I owe you some beer. Also, get better taste in beer.
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
I'm gonna forget you just shared your personal blowjob aesthetic with me and move on
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
Randomize
