is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
A stripper just got mad at me for saying goddammit. She's in no position to lecture me on morality
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
You don't understand how difficult it is to give head with cotton mouth
"Don't get as drunk as I was on my birthday" has been upgraded from a goal for Friday night to a goal for my life in general.
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
Do you have pictures of my pancakes
I need to show the world
They are the pancake equivalent of eventual wife
This is why you are going on a date. To see if he is fun or if we need to shank him in the parking lot.
THE FASTEST WAY TO MY HEART IS THROUGH FAMILY SIZED BAGS OF GENERIC BRAND CHEESE BALLS
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